Post Office Warfare??
Let the bloggage barrage begin.
Firstly, I am slightly embarrassed, slightly pleased and slightly uneasy to share with you the following fact. Turns out the last bloggage I posted was blocked by “net nanny” on our friend’s computer. Yup. She was not allowed to view this blog, because net nanny blocked it due to “weapon content”.
Thinking back on that bloggage, I remember being only slightly flustered with some of the local hardware vendors, and apparently I used weapon references. In fact it may have been “Thermonuclear weapon”. I suppose that would classify as weapon content, since it is the most destructive force our species had managed to concoct. However I am glad our governments are much more conservative in their threatened uses of nukes. I mean, if we really just went around nuking every place that had poor customer service, there would be a serious deficiency in places to shop. And a serious shortage of customers too. Personally, I would never EVER enter a store unless there was one of those big bragging sings posted outside, sort of like McDonald’s, that says something like “456,345 days of service since our last nuking!!!” Now there is a store that cares.
Speaking of store signs, I remember being totally shocked one of the last times I visited the post office in Middlefield, Ohio, during one of our visits to our fab fam. Posted on the door was the following sign (no joke):
“No guns allowed on premises” with a big “X” over a Glock 9.
WHAT!! But man, I always take my AK-47 when I go check the mail. If the door is jammed I just spray it with a clip or two to loosen things up a bit. And if I get one more furniture store flyer, I can blast it into oblivion with my pump shotty.
Actually, that sign made me nervous when I entered. I am only used to signs on establishments that say “No shirt, no shoes, no service”.
I guess I should have felt relieved being in that Post Office. “Whew! FINALLY, a gun-free public establishment!”. It actually had more of the opposite affect. What are you telling me here? Are you saying that enough people pack heat when going to check the mail that a freaking sign had to be posted discouraging against it?
Rather, I felt nervous and jittery, and looked at people with suspicion, wondering if their trigger fingers were itchy and twitchy since they had to leave their piece in the Land Rover. Nothing like getting your mail at the O.K. Corral. This sign would make more sense to me if I was a marine checking my mail at the local Sunni post office in Kandahar.
At that point, if someone decided to go postal in the post office, my escape plan involved superman diving over the postage counter at the first sign of hot lead, and then throwing fistfuls of free stamps over the counter as the tracers fly while screaming “postage on the house!” and making my escape in the ensuing mad rush for free postage stamps by all those involved in the gunfight. Hopefully I remember to bring my furniture flyer out with me, then at least it’s not a total loss.
Why am I thinking of post office anarchy? Well, shockingly, there actually is a connection to our new house. For my entire life I have been getting mail at the local post office located just a block away. But no longer! The other day we timidly, and with great trepidation, visited the bank of post office boxes in our new neighbourhood.
So it has been a CRAZY week up at the ol’homestead! And by ol’homestead, I mean our brand new house which is in no way associated with farming or an ancient family lineage. And now, with no further weapon references, here are the pictures:
It’s time for some hotness! My favorite person is up next…………..
So there you have it – another week at the ol’homestead. Hopefully your net nanny software didn’t have a conniption, and let you in to read this blog. I guess in retrospect we did briefly discuss shotguns, Nazis, trebuchet’s and clothing issues. We’ll tone it down for the next one, I promise.
Take care friends!